Bits and Pieces

So...I have difficulty with my writing lately.  I do not know why....well that's not true, I know why.  I have been so scattered lately.  I feel that I may need a new plan or a new direction for my life.  I have been dibble dabbling in some ideas.  One is buying a vacation home, which I love this idea because I could get away and just be and write.  Another is beginning an MBA program.  I'm smiling because the Fray just came on Pandora "I'll look after you".  Love it.  Anyways, I also have been getting that motherly itch.  I held a baby last Friday for the first time in several months, a 5 week old boy, and I almost started crying.  How I long to be a mother.  So like I said, I'm scattered brained.  I find that when this happens, a big, big change usually follows. Ironically, I finally feel settled here.  It has taken almost two years but I finally feel that sense of home.  I have a great routine back in my life, which is what I thrive on.  I like knowing what's happening each day and finally I have some sort of normalcy. But still, my thoughts are scattered.  I have also had trouble completing the writing for my book.  I know that I am strong enough to look back, but do I want to?  And my blog has suffered too...as you have noticed.  So with all of that being said...here's the solution. I honestly feel that when there is confusion, difficulty, cloudy thoughts, it's best to get back to the basics.  Start from the beginning and work you way through it.  For example, for me, it's getting back into my journal.  It is a new day and I have to write about it.  I have to capture these feelings, thoughts, behaviors that's driving me right now.  It gets me focused, grounded. I need that right now, but I know as soon as I say this...change is gonna come.  It's in the air.